Musings Archives | Oh My Janey

Twenty-Five and Thriving

June 11, 2015

A few years ago, being twenty-five seemed so old. I used to think that it’s the time when I should stop playing and start focusing on the life ahead of me. I had my life planned out till I’m twenty-five, and now that I am, none of those plans have been realized.

I’m neither a published author nor a young mother. I’m neither an English teacher in Korea nor a successful career woman in any field. I’m an office employee working nights and struggling to sleep during the day. I’m someone who’s just happy to be making ends meet and having time for my dramas and friends. Instead of having a minor heart attack realizing that my life is flashing quickly before my eyes, I am merely nodding along and thinking that life is still good.

The past year has been difficult, but I have to say that this is the happiest I’ve been in years. I am far from what you’d call successful, and I am miles away from achieving my dreams, no matter how little they may be. Yet, I can count my blessings and say that I have more than enough to be grateful. I even wonder if it’s safe to say that I have already defeated the so-called quarter-life crisis.

I am at the point in life where I have learned to stop comparing my minor accomplishments to my counterparts’ major ones. Though some people seem daunting at first, I learn to see them past their accomplishments or their work experience. Like me, they’re also probably at their own crossroads.

Of course, I am far from content with where I am right now. There are more things I want to achieve and more adventures I want to take. But I am still young and my dreams are not going anywhere. [Read more…]

My Two-Month Unemployment in Instagram Photos

March 8, 2015

For the past two months, I had been hibernating in Laguna while waiting for the “perfect job” to come my way. It’s a long and frustrating search after an impulsive decision to resign from my previous job. Though technically, I wasn’t a complete bum. I worked freelance for a month, but it doesn’t feel like “real” work when I do it at home in my PJ’s while watching anime.

At the middle of it, I started thinking that maybe I can just work at home full-time. But I realized that if I did so, I’d end up becoming a hermit. I can honestly not leave our house for five days straight. I’m a homebody first, wannabe traveler second. To save the socializing skills I somehow managed to practice in the past five years, I decided that an office-based job is the way to go. Besides, I realized that what I earned through freelancing wasn’t enough for me to afford a house and lot for sale in Sentosa Calamba.

Alas, last week had been quite miraculous when I received multiple job offers just when I was ready to give up. I honestly thought no company would like to hire me again (because my self-esteem is low like that). I thought I’d receive a backlash when I received a few job offers in January and decided to decline everything, due to different reasons. So I felt grateful when I got accepted in some companies, and I promised that this time, I will make a decision and pull through it all. It’s stupid to wait around for a “perfect” job because there will always be a downside. You just have to realize that some pros will always outweigh the cons.

After a week of torturous decision-making, I finally made my choice. No matter what choice I made, I realized that I won’t be on a losing end. So writing down the pros and cons of my options, I’m finally back in the workforce.

On Friday, I said goodbye to unemployment and said hello to working again in Makati. It was both good and bad. Good, because yay work! Bad, because I barely talked to anyone and I missed my old officemates. And worse, I learned that I’d be on a night shift in a few weeks’ time. I am contemplating whether I made the right decision, but I’m here now and there’s no turning back.

But I’m not here to talk about work. I’m here to talk about my joyous days in Laguna where I did nothing but eat and stay in front of the computer for days. It’s what I’d like to call a perfect life. [Read more…]

So Far, So Tired

April 19, 2014

Tired is good. Tired means I’m not just being idle with time. Tired means I’m exerting effort and trying to do something productive.

2014 has been an incredibly busy year so far. I feel like I’m always on the go that I barely have enough time for everything on my to-do list. I think this has been the longest time I haven’t watched an Asian movie. For a fanatic, that’s a sign that I’m really having some troubles balancing my time.

Obviously, I’ve been busy with blogging. Between Oh My Janey and Asian Fixations, my blogger hands are already full. But I love every minute of it. Writing has been my life-blood ever since I can remember, and the joy of writing whatever I want and having people actually listen (no matter how few!) is enough to make my heart go dugeun dugeun. I’ve also made quite a few friends from halfway across the universe since I started, and they’re probably the best reasons why blogging rocks.

My friends and I also recently started a site for Millenials in Manila which we decided to call Manillenials, because we’re cheesy like that. I am excited and happy for this project, because blogging is made 10 times more fun with friends. I have so much hope and dreams for this site, and I can’t wait to see it all unfold. I do hope we can maintain it and we never run out of stories. It’ll be tough, and I can only pray that it’ll be a fun ride.

Also, I chopped off my hair.
[Read more…]

The Big, Foolish Idea

March 4, 2014

I went to Baguio thinking it’s my much needed break from a very stressful work life. I thought I’d come back energized and motivated to work. It’s not that my workload is intensely unbearable, but I find myself dreading Mondays and wondering if I really have to go to the office. Everyday is becoming a chore, and it’s not doing any good to my mental and emotional stability. I mope around much more than I should.

I went to Baguio thinking I’ll be refreshed after the short vacation, but it actually worsened what I’m feeling. I now crave to be on the road again and to be away from the computer (unless it’s oppa related, of course). I now wish to be seated in an outdoor cafe feeling extremely cold, yet warmed by a cup of good coffee.

I think my patience is wearing thin. My family has long predicted that I wouldn’t last in an office job, but look at me going on my fourth year as an office worker. I think I’m reaching my limit. I wake up tired and go to sleep tired even on days when I didn’t do much at all. Everyday I feel like doing something drastic just to add a bit of spice in a relatively monotonous lifestyle. This is probably why I choose to kill myself by attending a class three nights a week. At least I have something to look forward to. At least I’m learning something new. [Read more…]

The Lake Monster

October 3, 2013

I had this delusion that anyone can be a fashion blogger. But of course, I realized that apparently, it’s only something that someone who’s dedicated to fashion and to looking good everyday can do. I am obviously neither. I do like dressing up but not to the extent that I do it everyday On most days, I just want to throw on a baggy sweater or a loose blouse and call it my OOTD.

Posing also isn’t my strongest suit. I can neither pose like a normal person nor a model, so how in the world would I even manage to be a fashion blogger? My now defunct fashion blog, The Sloppy Mess, proves that I’m just an average citizen who has more misses than hits when it comes to dressing up. Though posing is something that I do comically, I still enjoy doing it. Obviously.

Besides, 75% of my clothes are either thrifted or bought from Divisoria or St. Francis or just some random stall. It will be awkward to label my clothings “No brand” all the effin’ time! Like the one I’m wearing in the photos. The shirt and skirt have no brand, while the shoes are Keds. 90% of my photos would be labeled as such if I ever decide to be a full-fledged fashion blogger (which will never happen now!).

In Hanoi, we saw tons of people having a photo shoot. Jinky and I decided to have a go at it and here are the resulting photos. They’re no fashion blog-material. But I enjoyed it, and isn’t that what matters?

My friend once asked me why I act so stupidly when posing in the camera. Well, it’s because no one will take me seriously if I pose decently. Because I am a wacky person, and wacky poses are the only thing I know how to do. The ‘V’ is also ever-present in my photos. I’m a fangirl and I always make sure it shows. Haha.

It’s not like I’m aspiring to be a model, so why would I even try to pose like one?

Fashion is still something that continuously baffles me. Though I have to say that my fashion sense have tremendously improved over the years, I’m still far from being stylish. I’m not exactly someone you’d call well-dressed. I’m just glad, however, that my sister no longer cringes when she sees what I’m wearing. She used to do it a lot back in college. Hehe.

Deciding what to wear isn’t exactly easy for me. I wasn’t (and sometimes still not) very comfortable with my body type, and even know, I blame my boobs for limiting my fashion choices.

Once upon in high school, I abhor having boobs and resorted to wearing baggy clothes. I desperately try to hide them by slouching which developed into a bad posture. I go for loose clothing so I could hide my curves.

But I have far, far removed myself from that stage. Though I still don’t dare wear anything that shows cleavage, I no longer deliberately hide what I have. I still don’t wear tight-fitting clothes, but I no longer stupidly hide my curves. Most of the styles I want to try are still mismatched with my body type. But hey, I have learned to embrace the clothes that can supposedly flatter my figure.

I still have insecurities, and there are days when I don’t feel comfortable in my own skin. But I think it’s normal and not just because I’m a girl. I don’t have to feel pretty everyday, and I also don’t have to dress up to feel like a woman. I welcome good hair days with arms wide open, and curse the pimples that decide to appear on special occasions.

I’m not exactly sure what I’m trying to say with this post, and I’m quite at a lost on how to end it. So I’ll just leave it as is, okay. └（★ｏ★）┐