Oh My Janey

A Twentysomething’s Bucket List : 30 Before 30

thirty before thirty

Growing old has always been scary for me. Though I always look up at grownups and wonder if I’ll ever look as mature and responsible as them, the thought of aging another year every freaking year freaks me out. And that sentence is pretty messed up, but growing a year older is just really scary for me. I always feel like the clock is ticking and I should do something, anything.

That’s why I make lists. That’s why I start every week with a to-do list. That’s why I list down all the tasks I have to accomplish within the day. I love making lists, even though I can never cross out every item off the list. This is why making a bucket list has always been on the back of my mind, though I find it difficult to write one. This is is weird, though, because I wrote my first bucket list before I graduated from high school. This should come easier, right? I saw my old list and almost cried because the things I wanted when I was 15 are pretty much the same things I want now that I’m already 24! Some dreams never change.

There’s no better time to write one. I’m currently having an early onset of quarter-life crisis, and I think I really need to pause for a while and know what I want to do with my life. I can’t panic now, even though a doctor once said that I probably have anxiety disorder, heh. I’m only 24. I have my whole life ahead of me to figure out this shit.

I want to be so many things all at once but that’s impossible. So I’m only making a 30 Before 30 list, because figuring out the things I want till I’m 80 is a bit overwhelming. Let this be the first part of my bucket list. I’m challenging myself until 30 to accomplish these 30 things. I know bucket lists don’t sit well with some people, but I always need to be reminded of the things I have and need to do.

I thought limiting myself to just 30 things will be difficult. It turns out that filling in the list is even more challenging. But here it is. I came up with the 30 things that I’ve always wanted, things that I’m too lazy to do, and things that I’m too scared to try. These are some of the greatest desires and challenges of my heart. I can’t wait to cross them out one by one. And maybe, just maybe, repeat them again and again. [Read more…]

Fourteen Somethings

Hello! I think this is the first time in years that I’ll be blogging this late in a month. So many things have happened since my last post and I’ve been busy with work and my Korean class that I barely have time for anything else. My laptop’s also acting weird for the past few weeks so spending time in front of my computer doesn’t come easy. Huhu. But I finally had some time last night to organize this post, yahoo.

My favorite blogger ever, Arriane the Wanderrgirl, proposes an idea of setting a theme for your year. Since I already have little goals listed, I only had to think of a “word” that encompasses everything I want to accomplish this year. And the first word that crossed my mind was INITIATE.

I think it’s a very fitting word for me, because I lack initiative. I’m lazy (and shy) as hell. There are so many things I want to accomplish but most of the time, I fail to move an inch. So this year, I want to take that first step, and keep on taking another step until I achieve what I want. And I really need to want it hard enough to motivate me.

I have 14 goals for this year, because it’s 2014. LOL. But really. It’s not a bucket list, because I think it’s too general to cross out each one. It sounds so many, but I always feel like there’s a ticking bomb I have to beat somehow. Also, I’m already 23, and I haven’t achieved something that I’m proud of. Sadly.

So here’s my over-the-top 2014 goals. I hope to achieve at least one. Dream high, butterfly. Heh.
PRIORITY CAREER

Pretty much the cause of my quarter-life crisis last year, I just don’t know where I’m going in my life. Believe me, I understand how I can use my three years of experience in SEO to flourish in the field and maybe use it personally. But I’m always seeking for something more. I’m always wondering if I’ll ever get to be a ~writer~. Sometimes, I also miss teaching. I want to know and decide what I really want to be!

I can’t give up writing. I want to go back to teaching. And I don’t think I can ever escape SEO! So this year, I need to somehow find a way to make these three work together! It sounds impossible, but I’ll make it possible. I mean, you can’t be passionate about multiple of things and not find a way to practice all, right? So by the end of the year, I hope I’m no longer moping about my career. I’m sick of hearing myself be so whiny about things I can control. [Read more…]

Christmas Wishlist 2014

wishlist

I didn’t spend much on material stuff this year. Thus, this is probably my longest wishlist to date!

  1. White/Chambray button-down shirt – It’s on my list every year, wth. I need a thrift shop visit soon.
  2. Yellow Fujifilm Instax – Another one that’s on  the list every friggin’ year.
  3. Tohoshinki’s TONE and TIME tour DVDs – So expensive!
  4. Tablet – Any tablet really, as long as it has an expandable memory that I can fill with movies and ebooks.
  5. Platform white Chuck Taylors – Where can I buy one?!
  6. One Piece UNIQLO shirts – It’s no longer available in MOA! 🙁
  7. Tony Tony Chopper plushie – I love Chopper. ‘Nuff said.
  8. Bandage skirts – Or skater skirts. Whichever will do.
  9. Gillian Flynn’s Gone Girl – Also, Neil Gaiman’s Ocean at the End of the Lane, Arthur Conan Doyle’s Complete Sherlock Holmes collection, and so much more.
  10. Fujifilm X-E2 – I NEED a new camera.
  11. Moleskin – Too effin’ expensive. Any notebook that can serve as a journal is okay. Hee.
  12. Ballet flats – A black and a red pair please.
  13. The Daykeeper 2014 – It’s a journal/datebook and it’s so pretty!
  14. Scholarship in Korea – I don’t knooooooow. I really really want it but so many objections lol.
  15. Brazilian Blowout or a Brazilian Keratin treatment, too. My hair needs to be saved from all the frizz. Heuheu.

It probably sounds selfish to still have a materialistic wishlist this year, but I can’t help it! It’s not like I’ll end up having all of these anyway. Most of the time, I only get 1/4 of the things I list down every year. And almost everyone of them I buy with my own money. I don’t mind, though. Wanting things makes me work harder, despite my constant complaints that I don’t like my job. Haha.

Also, I’m perfectly happy as it is. I won’t go moping around if I won’t have any of these in the next year. I mean, my family, friends and boyfriend are more than enough to be happy. I can travel from time to time, and I get to watch as many Korean dramas and movies, too! The only thing left I can really wish for is a career I can love. A career, not just a job. But I’m trying to take little steps to achieve that. This year is the most I’ve been writing, really writing, what I want since I graduated from high school.

Anyway, enough about me. What do you want for Christmas? 🙂

Birthday Wishlist Ver. 23.0

wishlistIn just a few weeks I’m turning another year older, and for the first time in a long time, I actually feel excited. I’m a birthday grinch after all, but suddenly growing older doesn’t sound too bad!

Anyway, since my birthday’s near, it’s time for another wish list! I don’t want much this year. Oh really.

  1. Holga 120 – I borrowed Kimpee’s Holga 120 for my Hong Kong/Macau trip last weekend, and I enjoyed using it! I think most of my shots are fail ones, though. Haha. I also bought a box of three color negative films, and I didn’t get to use one. So I now feel obliged to buy my own Holga to use the films. Haha. A secondhand will do. 🙂
  2.  16GB SD card – I’ve had my phone for about 6 months now, but I’m getting a bit stingy about this. Hee.
  3. The Complete Sherlock Holmes – I already have the ebook but I’d really rather have the books. I got addicted to Sherlock Holmes after I watched the BBC series Sherlock. Then I watched RDJ’s Sherlock Holmes, then watched Elementary! So I really, really want to read the book.
  4. 4GB flash drive – Just because. 🙂
  5. Close encounter with CNBLUE – They’re having a concert here in June so I’m hoping that I’d be able to get in close contact with them in the airport. Haha.
  6. Tone concert DVD – Pretty much the only thing I’m planning to buy in HK but I passed by only one music store and it’s not available. When oh when would I be able to buy this one. Huhu

Dear friends, I know that most aren’t cheap, but you can just chip in if you want. I won’t mind. Wahahaha. 🙂

The Promise to Do Better

I started 2013 by being wacky and I wish that by the end of the year, I still have this silliness in me. People are supposed to change consistently, right, but I don’t want this part of me to change. I do hope that whatever shit I get myself into this year, I’d still manage to smile and laugh at the end of the day. I am pretty sure that this year’ll be one roller coaster ride, but I have always loved roller coasters so I’m pretty excited! (I know, I don’t make sense sometimes.)

I have thought of coming up with another comprehensive list of plans and goals for this year, but I did that for 2012 and look what little it helped. Then I thought of not doing another one, because heck, I’d probably end up not doing a single thing from the list! But then here I am, trying to come up with another because really, I cannot sit still without knowing that I have some things to accomplish for this year. I always rely on lists, making one the first thing I do for everything. It’s not like I religiously follow them, but there’s just something so fulfilling about crossing out an item.

You know, there’s at least something that I vowed last year that  tried to do until the very end, and that’s to go out of my comfort zone! And to live recklessly! I didn’t take giant steps but I took human steps, okay. I also don’t know what that means, but at least it’s not just baby steps. Heh. But there are some things that I did last year that 2011 Jane wouldn’t have done. That’s why at the end of 2012, I was happy. And I still am, of course.

As usual, I do not have a new year’s resolution because I know I’ll never be able to faithfully do it anyway. But there are some things I want to try and some things I know I should do.

repeat goals [Read more…]

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