The Best Year

Just like that, I turned a year older!

Will this be the best year ever? I am claiming it will be but, not yet, because a week after I turned 32, I, unfortunately, caught Covid for the first time. So yes, dear reader, I am sick in bed as I type this birthday blog post. But don’t worry. I feel a lot better now and can confidently say that I’ll feel even better tomorrow.

Nevertheless, I had an amazing birthday week, though the following week I’m spending in the confines of my bedroom, sleeping, eating, reading, more sleeping, and seeing no one but Eren and the rest of the Attack on Titan gang (I am now on season 3).

Anyway!

My 31st year was amazing and did a lot of the things I said I’d do.

I got to go home for two months earlier this year, just in time for my mother’s and my nephew’s birthdays. I finally got to meet my nephew! (That reminds me, I never found time to blog about my homecoming. Maybe one of these days!)

I got to travel! I went to Bohol with friends, to Quezon with my family, and to Penang by myself. It felt great to discover new places and to spend time with family and friends in new settings.

I’m still trying new stuff, like what I said I’d do last year. I learned how to ride a bike last year, which had been a lifelong goal. I’ve been doing muay thai lately, and I actually tried vlogging. The 28-year-old me who said she would never try vlogging would be so shocked. But I guess I’m at an age wherein I care less and less about what people think. Also, editing videos is actually easier than sitting down to write a blog post?? Maybe because I don’t care much about video quality, hehe.

Last year was definitely fun. Still had a lot of hiccups, but to be honest, I felt like it really was a good year. I couldn’t have it all, of course. But I was happy.

I remember a friend telling me that I look happy in my posts but he wasn’t sure if I am actually happy. I was happy to report that if I looked happy, it’s because I am happy. Of course not all the time, but life is good and I am in a good place. 🙂

There was a weekend last March when I went to Quezon with my family. We stayed in a beach resort with no mobile signal. It was the first time in a really long time that I felt disconnected from the rest of the world for two days. And I thought I wanted time to just stop, and I wondered if I could just stay there forever.

I was happy and content as I spent the sunset swimming at the beach with them, and I thought that I had everything I needed in life right there and then. I didn’t want to go back to the real world.

But alas, I had bills to pay and I am not a golden spoon that I didn’t have to go back to work. Though that short trip was a welcome relief after months of struggle and years of feeling homesick.

Life is far from perfect, but I have family and friends who love me and I love wholeheartedly, too.

So, I welcomed my 32nd year knowing how lucky, how blessed I truly am.

I still didn’t get to go home for my birthday this year, but it’s okay! I still had a blast and spent it with people I love. Maybe next year I’d be rich enough to actually spend it traveling, and who knows! I might actually win Toto or something.

This year, I had an amazing Mexican dinner on my birthday, spent the weekend at Tanjong beach, and had some friends over for Sunday lunch. To even have friends to spend my birthday with is a blessing in itself.

Finally after three years, there was no quarantine or circuit breaker imposed on my birthday month!

Of course, there are still a lot of things I wish for (such as worrying less about money, having better hair, having six-pack abs, etc.), but this year I spent more time feeling grateful on my birthday. For now, my only wish is to be free of Covid. And to find true love, but that’s secondary.

I still don’t feel 32, and I’m not even sure how this age is supposed to feel like. I sometimes feel I look too young, and I sometimes think I’m still too immature. I sometimes feel shallow for liking the things I like and enjoying the things I do. But I reprimand myself for thinking like that, because I want to live an unapologetic life.

I’m not sure how I am supposed to feel now, but I feel great for my age.

I tried documenting my birthday week, but I realized I didn’t take as much footage as I thought I did. I guess I was enjoying too much. Still, I’m just glad to have documented one of my best birthday weeks so far.